Yes More “I Love You’s”!

Going personal in this one, it has been a while. You will recognize the twist from Annie Lennox’s famous song: No More “I Love You’s.” The year 2021 has left a devastating sense of grief and loss as many close family members, friends, and colleagues passed away. My husband and I also had to say goodbye to a very close friendship, which left us wondering how much more could be lost. For the first time in my life, I did not welcome the new year as bubbly and joyful, but rather as just time moving forward. Yet, I remained fully aware of the deep Love inside that never flinched nor flickered despite the surrounding context. As you know, life takes us in many directions, distracts us with short-term pleasures, and takes away those we cherish the most. And so, my heart feels to share this simple message: Please say ‘I love you’ more often.

Different Ways to Say: I Love You

Once I recognized the Love of God inside my heart, there was an explosion of joy that I could barely contain. Yes, I have been the crazy one who started saying ‘I love you’ to random people I met. I even said it to a food delivery man after he said that my house radiated with peace. Here are some different ways to say, ‘I love you,’ if you do not want to come across as crazy as I did by saying these words very often.

1. Share a song, a book, or a piece of art with those that came to your mind as you were listening to it. Chances are that they came into your mind because that particular song, book, or art, is what they need to hear or see at exactly the time you will share it with them. It might seem a very simple gesture but when you look deeper into the connection you have with them, you realize that it is Love that unites you.

2. Hold space for someone who is going through a rough patch. It can be as simple as just listening to them attentively. When you hold space, you are saying to someone that you care and that you are simply here for them. Another way to hold space for someone is to ask them: How can I love you today? Or, How can I show you that I care? It is different from offering to provide help. Helping suggests that you are better off than they are or that they need to be down so that you can rescue them. When you hold space for someone, you start by acknowledging that you are both in the same space - the same Love - and all you do is show them this safe space to unwind and regain their power.

3. Be fully present when you spend time with someone. Your full attention or presence might be the new gold or alchemy, especially nowadays, where we are distracted by so many stimuli. You will be surprised by what you can learn about or from someone if you are not looking at your phone or smartwatch every two minutes. Being fully present here and now is the best gift to yourself and the most beautiful way to say: I love you. It is because you are aware of the connection with others, with the flow of life, with God.

Open Your Heart to Receive Love

As probably many of you, I grew up in different households where saying: I love you; was not considered the norm. We spoke a lot about events, people, and things but little about feelings, emotions, or love. When I started to open my heart fully to the Love of God and shared it openly with my family, I was surprised by how quickly my children showed how much they loved me. I remember distinctively the day my youngest son held me in his little arms and said that he loved me so very much and that he never wanted to live without me. It was so much Love and so beautiful that my heart could hardly contain it; it was almost too painful. It seems silly to say, but it took me a while to get used to receiving Love freely without thinking that I had to do anything else in return.

It is hard to receive Love freely because we put so many conditions on who we want to receive this Love from. We also separate Love into different types, each following specific patterns and interactions. The Love coming from our friends, parents, children, lovers, etc., is the same but experienced differently. To open our hearts fully and to live from our hearts requires us to learn to receive Love, regardless of the shape it takes or of when we receive it. We can share this Love freely once we are accustomed to receiving it as you can only give what you received or what you already have inside.

I hope to have inspired you to open your hearts to receive more Love and to try different ways to love one another. And as with almost everything in life, you are bound to become an expert with steady practice. A beautiful Love expert. How wonderful the world can be!

Photo by Taj Joti Kaur. Hot chocolate delivered with heart-shaped whipped cream at Sal airport in Cabo Verde islands.